You don’t want anything to change, you can’t handle life when it’s not steady and unchanging. Well, life isn’t like that, new things come up a...l the time, it’s those surprises and variations that make life fun. I thought – stupidly, I see now – I thought that you might like to do that with me. But you don’t give a flying fuck about what I want, you don’t want anything to interrupt your quiet, peaceful, boring existence. Well, fuck you, Will Morris. Fuck that for a joke. I’m not going to sit. I think that iswhat I am going to call you.Bye-bye************Day 11Dear DiarySometimes I think I am flighty. I want to write in you and then Idon't. I don't know. It feels good but I do not think it is right.Even with it feeling natural to write in you, I do not think it isright. I can keep a journal for my thoughts. I can keep a notebookeven, just lying around the house. No, for some reason I do it in abook which I have hidden away in my sock drawer. Why do people hidethings in a sock drawer?. ‘Why have you chosen to stay with us Soppy? Your parents know about your disgrace.’ ‘Well Dingo, you are my father’s younger brother and he’s always put you down and Auntie Wreck always has been softer and more sympathetic than her best friend, my mother.’ ‘Oh darling, what a wonderful thing to say about me. Me sympathetic? God I must be getting soft.’ The legal mind of David clicked three notches. ‘In effect darling Soppy did not paint you as being sympathetic. All she said was you always have. I knew I was going to let Tommy fuck me pretty soon. I knew that, but I wasn't quite ready yet. My imagination was already moving on to some other possibilities, even. Actually, "let" wasn't quite the right word here. I was going to fuck Tommy just as much as he was going to fuck me. We had been equals since the beginning and I was intent on making sure that continued. Pretty sure that was the way Tommy wanted it, too.An hour later, Tommy long gone, I was sleepy and relaxed in Monica's arms,.
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